New visa, new adventures.

It’s that time of year again, I’m switching schools so that means a new visa. New visas mean embassy visits, police checks and health checks. I’ve not had the best track record with health checks see here, here, here and here.

I’ve only had to visit the embassy in Hanoi when I first arrived. More than 4 years ago. So, I was a bit nervous about my visit, for no real reason. But I always get nervous around authority. It’s my Catholicism.

I had to get a few papers notarized. So, I made an appointment a month before I needed to go. I went to the embassy knowing they take everything from you when you enter.

Electronics, don’t bother. Water, don’t bother. You should come with a print out of what you need, your passport, no liquids, a bit of money and maybe a book to read.

(But maybe think before you pick. My El Chapo book choice was maybe questionable because when he pulled the book out of my bag, backside up...AMERICA!)

So, that’s what I had. Pretty much nothing. Plus my phone.

At least I thought.

I ran into another American who had an appointment after me. We’ve both been to the embassy before so, like pros, we both had minimal things with us. The guard asked for all of our electronics and we put our phones in a numbered bag. He gave us each a ticket for our belongings (like a coat check). He then asked if he could search our bags. Sure! We said, we have nothing! Not even a USB!

Meanwhile, I have 75 zippers in my purse. That I thought I emptied out.

SG: What’s this?

Me: Um, that’s my bank security card, it’s ok you can take it.

SG: What’s this?

Me: Um, oh! those are the keys for my apartment, that’s just a garage door openener. It’s ok, you can take it too.

SG: What’s this?

Me: Um, oh! those are my allergy eye drops...

...here’s where things got weird.

SG “what IS this?” Holding my eye drops higher.

Me “they’re eye drops for my eyes” (pointing at my eye)

SG “...can you show me?”

Me “...like, put them in my eyes?”

SG “...yyeess? Try them now.”

Me: looks at other dude, we both giggle awkwardly like WHY?... “ok...”

The security guard stopped watching me while I’m putting the eye drops in my eyes and I was like leaning back adding eye drops while trying to watch him, hopefully, watch me “sir, please watch me put these eye drops in...”  

The other guy there for an appointment was cracking up because I was like “sir, do you see them running down my face, I did it already...did you see me do it? They’re in my eyes now...” he didn’t care. He’d moved on to inspecting my gum.

Moral of the story, even when you think you’re following the rules, think again or you may have to squirt things in your eyes to prove it.